Emotions of Change

So, I've been out on vacation for the past two weeks in Utah, and it's giving me time to think a lot about.... I've got to spend a lot of time hanging out with old friends as well as get to know new friends. It’s made me realize just how difficult this journey is going to be. While I am absolutely ecstatic about leaving for the Peace Corps I also want to be realistic with you all. I’m so going to miss my life here in the States!!! I know that much will change while I am gone and while I will be able to occasionally contact some friends and family, I know that will be a rare occasion (compared to the consistent availability of technology here). As I say “see you later” more and more it starts to really kick in that I really am saying “good bye” because when I return both they and I will have changed so very much. I am grateful for the changes that I know will be coming BUT I know that I will not be the only one to change. I think the hardest realization is that I know I won’t be there to comfort or celebrate with those whom I love so much. I can’t send my random SMILE texts, or swing by for babysitting breaks, or if I lose/gain someone in my family I will not be beside my mom’s side as she goes through those moments. (This is a decision I made, Peace Corps gives you leave, but I have decided that I will not return to America during my service because I think it would be too tempting to stay if I did). The main reason THIS is going to be hard is I’m such a mommies girl, even during our ups and downs I have ALWAYS spoken to my mom regularly, even while in Costa Rica, This is going to be hard for me BUT it’s gonna to be hardest on my Mother. She has always had to deal with my nomadic lifestyle and while she hasn't agreed with some of my choices she has ALWAYS been there with arms welcoming me home and has tried everything she can to make sure I have what I need. I am grateful to the Lord for letting her be my mother, I know I wouldn't be who I am today without her. I also know so many of my family and friends have shaped my life. To quote a song, “you are the wind beneath my wings”. I know I could not do all of the amazing things I am doing without such a supportive network of friends and family. SO THANK YOU for always supporting me even if you don’t always agree with me, I truly love you all so deeply and I am sorry I am going to miss out on so many parts of your lives, but it is time for me to soar and see just how far I can fly! But always remember no matter how far away I am we will always be under the same sky and I will always know where my safe harbors are.

For those thinking and preparing to join Peace Corps know that the journey is one of pure emotion and many times you will wonder what you are getting yourselves into, but remember where much is given much is required. You will never regret getting out of your comfort zone and giving a piece of your heart to others because in return they fill the very corners of your soul!  

SMILE you are LOVED!

Jump'n Jenny

Until Next Time!
JumpInTheJungle